You are not your beliefs

This one can be quite an eye opener if you have not heard of it before.

When interacting with others, sometimes we can end up defending a particular belief, idea or position. This can be a useful tool, but sometimes it is possible to take it a bit too far.

You are not your beliefs. By attaching the sense of self to particular concepts, you open up a duality of being “right” or “wrong” about something. In turn, this polarization can lead to sticky situations, where you feel under attack when you encounter someone who is pushing an agenda that conflicts with your own.

A great way to work with this is pretty simple: lose. See what that is like. Next time you sense someone is getting defensive about something, try “losing” and see what happens as one of the two fists stops fighting.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying everyone should become a tree hugging pacifist. Fight when appropriate, but at least be aware of the mechanisms that lead you there.